Tony Bennett crooned that he left his heart in San Francisco. I can relate about that for many destinations. I didn’t realize, however, that I was going to leave my youth at Machu Picchu. If it sounds mysterious and metaphorical, it’s because it is.

Newly empty-nesters, my husband and I planned this trip to Peru with the enthusiasm and longing of college kids going backpacking through foreign countries. Weeks and months went by as we fine-tuned the logistics of all the trains, planes, automobiles, and buses it would take to get to Machu Picchu. I packed all of the necessary items to combat altitude sickness which was more of an issue in Cusco than at Machu Picchu. We purchased the right clothing items for this excursion. I had the right camera equipment and lenses ready. We awoke early to caffeinate and stand in line for the bus with the multitudes. When we arrived, we found a guide and formalized our plan of which route to take. We didn’t even “climb” Machu Picchu like the hardcore hikers do. We hiked up many inclines and climbed long “staircases” to find perches to view this glorious citadel in the sky. A 7:00 a.m. arrival to view the sunrise was ambitious enough as it was and the 20 minute winding bus ride was rigorous. There were trails for the elderly and the compromised and that made me happy to know that everyone can enjoy the same dream at their own pace. For me, just lifting my heavy camera lens was a workout that day but I didn’t even feel it because I was in a euphoric zone. Three hours of this trekking and shooting was exhilarating. There are various routes one can take and we chose the route that included the Guardhouse.

Atop a particular boulder, I decided to do a wardrobe change and quickly changed my outdoorsy pants for shorts. Somehow I forgot all about the “noseeums” bugs that search for human flesh. They feasted on me. They came out of nowhere and sucked the blood right out of my arms and legs. They should’ve just set a table with fine china, silver, and candles to accompany their gluttonous bounty. The “ouch” moment soon disappeared when I found some campesinas to photograph. This had been a photography goal of mine for years. The gracious, elderly campesinas traipsed around the site representing their heritage with vigor and pride. They allowed people to take their photos. I marveled at how they were decked out in their native folk dress and hats.

When we descended from the kingdom in the clouds, we found a place in Aguas Calientes that sold cold beer and warm empanadas. I sat there breathlessly with my husband enjoying not only the snack and beverage but the feeling of accomplishment. We were able to see Machu Picchu and the weather conditions were perfect! This is not always the case for eager tourists. There are times there is no visibility up there.  Back at our hotel, we enjoyed a hot tub and tended to some sores on our feet. Although we didn’t camp or climb it, it was still an athletic adventure somewhat.

Back home in Tulsa, I crafted my travel article and photos of Machu Picchu for an upcoming  submission to the magazine I write for and it was a fulfilling sensation to do so. I look back on that trip and I realize some things about myself changed. I was aware that I became winded while maneuvering with camera equipment, etc. I realized I looked tired in the early a.m. photos. I laughed at the fact that I forgot about the “noseeums” but remembered to take altitude sickness precautions. We were old enough that we were empty nesters but young enough to enjoy a beer at 11 a.m. When the tour was over, I jokingly stamped my arm with a Machu Picchu “passport” sticker that people add to their passports. I made mine a temporary tattoo which made a little girl giggle. I was teetering between both youthful humor and also midlife awareness of my own future physical limitations. We are decades away from needing to use the elderly trail for touring but starting to feel our own limits.

On the train ride back to Ollantaytambo to connect back to Cusco, we rode with a newlywed couple celebrating their first anniversary. We reminisced about our own newlywed years and spoke to them about our grown sons who were away at college. That day culminated in many thoughts and feelings for me. The thoughts and feelings melded into discoveries. I was celebrating a milestone without every really planning to do so or to realize it. I was entering an age where women change. I prefer the word evolving over the word change because it implies a work in progress. This time of change is both mental and physical. Mentally, we were able to enjoy an adventure for ourselves without our sons. Physically, I was entering an age where youthfulness and vitality were starting to slip away and become replaced with wisdom, serenity, and less stress. I honestly feel like I left some things symbolically up at Machu Picchu because of the height and mysterious location of it. The bugs attacking me so quickly were part of that swarm of energy taking parts of me biologically for their survival. Llamas graze freely up there and obviously these little bugs do, too.

Spiritually and chronologically, I connect certain age-related timelines to that Machu Picchu experience. Midlife is a phase that can be welcomed properly with certain celebrations and adventures. I gained more inspiration (and self-awareness) to continue to take more adventures. From the giggling girl at the passport stamp “tattoo” moment to the elderly, elegant campesina women, I am somewhere in the middle.

I left my youth at Machu Picchu but I didn’t leave my youthful spirit and curiosity.

© Gina Michalopulos Kingsley

all photos by Gina Kingsley